Friday, June 06, 2008

Hi everyone.

Computer is completely crapped out, so I'm back to the library and will be checking in a few times a week. I don't know what to do about my home unit. Anybody know anything about replacing a bad motherboard... whatever that is?

On the up side, Lucy is coming home on Sunday. Pray for both of us!

Ladies and Gentlemen;

We have some serious interviewing to be conducting. The job applicants have been narrowed down to just two and they want us to hire one of them to fill the position of President of the United States.

Now suppose, for a moment (humor me) that these two men had applied for the job of… oh I don’t know… say… janitor of your office complex.

If you were the Human Resources Director, during the interview process, would you hire someone who gave the following answers to your questions?

HRD: Tell me about yourself.

APPLICANT: I have big dreams and huge plans. I intend to succeed in all aspects of this position.

HRD: Okay, good. What previous experience do you have in janitorial work?

APP: I’ve never actually been a janitor. Obviously, your previous janitor has failed miserably at this position. Look at the dust on the desktops, the streaks on the windows and the garbage overflowing from the trash containers.

HRD: And how would you proceed to improve this environment?

APP: I would be willing to apply all my energy to changing this environment.

HRD: And how would you do that?

APP: I would do away with the desks, thus eliminating any place for dust to collect. I would replace all the glass in the windows with particle board, which would in turn eliminate the streaks. I would eliminate the need for trash containers by prohibiting any office worker to generate garbage.

HRD: Interesting. Tell me about your education in the area of cleaning and maintenance.

APP: I have no education in that area, but I do have a Law Degree from Harvard and I have worked tirelessly distribute brooms and dustmops throughout the poor districts of my city.

HRD: I see. Thank you for coming in today. We’ll be in touch. Next applicant, please!

(Tune in next week for the second interview)


Joe B said...

Very nice...I'd also add:
The person that actually thought me to clean hates janitor's union. He said "oh no, no more god bless the union, but God DAMN the union". The Union actually created mess to keeps schools dirty to keep themselves employed. Oh by the way, I am also qualified to clean in all 57 states and used to work in Sunshine Florida.

Cliff said...

Good post. Methinks I'm really going to like the next one.

Jamie Dawn said...

Hey, you! It's good you were able to get to the library and post again. You need to kick your motherboard in the bohunkus!!
I'm not at all happy with McCain as our Republican candidate, but he is better than Obama. I'd love for us to have a true conservative who was also a great orator.
Also, our weak Republicans in Congress are really pissing me off. Where's their voice on global warming nonsense and the need to drill our own oil and build refineries and nuclear plants and to work quickly towards new energy sources??? Where's their voice on Iraq and touting the good news from there for a change??? We need some great leadership on our party. We are sorely lacking.
I think McCain will be our next president because people will not be sure about Obama since they don't know enough about him. His choice of longtime associations is also very troubling.
We shall see...

Shirley said...

I'd hire him.

Rachel said...

I'll wait for the next interview!!

Janell said...

Good addition, Joe!

Thanks, Cliff.

Hi JD; I agree - the R's have really let me down, too. They all need to grow a pair and stand up for their constituants a little better.

Shirley - I knew you would.

Rachel - Yeah, I hope the next one is better.

Jim said...

Janell, I'm in hiding this week, or at least the first part of the week. I do read some comments and discretly comment on a few blogs that I do read. They are mostly reciprical right now.

I can't hardly wait to see how the other applicant does, I sure would have a hard time choosing. How do you think Mickey Mouse would do?
BTW, thank you for the Red Sea thought, I hadn't thought of this that I can remember.

Myrnagj said...

I'd fire the HRD.

Janell said...

Jim; Micky Mouse? I dunno - I hadn't thought about including him!

Myrna; you'd be firing yourself - my original post said YOU are the HRD. :)