Monday, March 31, 2008

This is a good one:

A pair of Classic Rednecks came through my checkout line today. I mean, EVERYTHING about them screamed “hick”: overalls, denim jackets over hooded sweatshirts totally stained with oil & grease, dirty fingernails, tattered seed corn baseball style caps. Right down to the food they bought: meat tenderizer, seasoning salt, two steaks, two baking potatoes and a case of beer among a few other things. They split the grocery bill right down the middle. I counted out the money the second one handed me and I came up 4 cents short. I said, “I need four more cents. Can you find me 4 more pennies?”

The first guy said, “Hell, yes, he’s got pennies. He’s always loaded with pennies.”

“Yeah,” the second man agreed, “But you ain’t never had no cents.”

Everyone within earshot burst out laughing.

Especially me.

11 comments:

Scarlet said...

That's too funny! I'll have to remember that line when I'm IN line w/ my husband. :) I think it works if you're a redneck or an old married couple.

Mary Connealy said...

Well, redneck or not, they're sharp.

Sue said...

Thanks for the laugh.
Sue

Jamie Dawn said...

Hicks have a great sense of humor.
They also know how to heartily laugh, or guffaw and chortle and snort.
None of 'em gots any cents though.

:-)

LaDawn said...

ROFL! I'm glad you changed jobs, Janell. You could write a book called Supermarket Stories!

Flip Flop Momma said...

HA, u can rack up the stories thru the checkout line huh?

hehe

Shirley said...

I think you were set up. Pretty funny.

Cliff said...

You promised me you'd keep that quiet. BTW the steaks were good.
See you next week J.

Rachel said...

LOL!! I guess there are rednecks everywhere!!!

Janell said...

Scarlet; you're right.That line could work with anyone on so many levels!


Yeah, Mare, they were sharp that day.

Sue; you're welcome.

JD; PERFECT asessment!

LDCP; I'm working on it. Although the book I have in mind includes a lot of "Based on a true story" segments. I combine several people I come in contact with into one character. Our old friends Doris Lessing et al do it all the time.

Momma; I think of you every time I feel like sneezing while I'm making change!

Shirl;You might be right but it sure seemed spontaneous enough to make me laugh.

Sorry to blow your cover, Cliff. I'll be more careful in the future.

Rachel; Yes. Rednecks are like bad pennies... they just keep turning up! BTW, I had a lady from Kentucky come thrugh my line the other day. She was in NE visiting an Aunt & Uncle and bought over $300 worth of groceries for them! What a gal!

Jim said...

I didn't know they had rednecks in Nebraska. They must have sneaked in, there weren't any while I was there!

There were plenty of hicks. A few even rode to high school with me on our horses.
Ha! Not really hicks, just nice girls who waited for me at the bottom of the hill on their horses! I see one of them just about every time I come to Tekamah, you probably know her.
..